Communication:  I think I have never learned…better stated…forced to learn more about communication in my life than I have this semester in my classes, specifically this one.  It is so vital to having a pleasant classroom experience to have an open line with not only the instructor but with classmates.  With classmates:  it is estimated that a person retains only 10% of what they hear while in any given class.  Chances are, you’ve missed something.  Keeping that communication alive with other students helps lessen the chances that you have forgotten an important piece of information.  With the instructor:  Holy moley.  In the past I have been intimidated to be upfront with my instructor, but Frances, I have really learned to value that with you.  No other teacher ever notices (or at least they don’t tell me that they notice) when my mood shifts or tells me when they are trying to read each of our expressions.  This has caused a few “mishaps” in our relationship, but I feel that I respect you and value your opinion so much more for the ability we have to tell each other exactly what we think and yet joke around and talk about books and movies and the passion and intensity of all that is education the next.  So yeah, in a nutshell…communication is good. J

Research:  I had an experience with a student I’m working with at Apache that told me about (please know this is in secret that I am sharing this, since it still is in the research phase) her adult “boyfriend” at the pueblo she dances at that gives her money if she dances well.  Now, to me, this seems like an atrocity and it absolutely turns my insides into jelly.  This could be nothing more than a platonic relationship, but her reluctance to share what the relationship was and the fact that they have some sort of “initiation” later on frightens me.  I have been trying to do research more on this pueblo and on the people group to see what this is about to see if it is just a question of semantics or if it really is something to cause worry.  So I have used research these last few weeks that I never in a million years would have figured I would use it for.  Yikes….

Technology:  I’m becoming less fond of and more dependant on technology as time goes on.  Part of me wants to completely throw it out the window – wants to go back to when life revolved around enhancing life in its most basic forms – carving wood – writing on paper - using pencils – the feel of books – the excitement of toys and manipulatives – the smell of the outdoors.  Alas, life is moving in another direction and I need to learn to use technology to the best of it’s abilities, and keep a firm balance on real life (not excluding the fact that technology is some kids’ “real life”.)

Collaboration:  This Apache project has really stretched me in the area of collaboration.  Not only are we as a class having to depend on each other for this project to be successful, but we are collaborating with a group of kids that at times are less than thrilled to have another writing project.  We are pooling our efforts and instincts into a huge pot and we are all taking bits and pieces of each others knowledge of the subject and we are blending it together to make something that, even if it doesn’t seem perfect, is extremely beautiful.  This project is teeming with life – our lives – the kid’s lives (and imaginations J).

Five Dimensions of Learning

Confidence and Independence:  Kids have no confidence in themselves.  I know that this is a bold and harsh statement, but I’ve notices with working in my classes this semester at Apache, Animas, and Tibbets in such a major and sad way.  Kids are not believing that their work is ever good enough, or they set themselves up with low expectations so that their efforts are not slammed down and it absolutely breaks my heart.  All of these five dimensions of learning flow together, but they begin somewhere – they begin at home on one level and at school on another…and I have honestly seen kindergarten teachers criticizing their students with words and actions that resemble a football coaches.  We are not football coaches.  We are moms and dads and firefighters and nurses and motivational speakers and comedians and…well you get the point.  We are here to build them up.  Not tear them down.  And when we use our abilities to build children up, they become confident and independent and they really can reach the utmost of their abilities.

Knowledge Content:  I’m going to turn this into a statement because it really is something that it hitting me hard.  Knowledge content should not overshadow our instincts as teachers to teach our kids what they need to know…not for the test…but for life.  Yes it is important to know book knowledge – everyone knows that you need that in order to get a good job and be successful (in the mental sense – we are more mentally healthy when we are constantly learning than just stagnant), but we need to realize that our kids come first.  Not our textbooks.  The more life experiences we can give our kids, the more they will be curious to know what it’s about and how it works.  This is almost why I feel that the four blocks system we’re using with our Apache kids is a bit of a hindrance to their growth as writers and as storytellers.  I definitely understand that it gives structure to the story – but we need our kids to be confident enough in themselves that they don’t mind if the blocks aren’t filled in perfectly.

Skills and Strategies:  There are so many skills and strategies I don’t even know where to begin.  I truly had a hard time working out the issues with a few of the kids I was working with at Apache.  The lack of want to try and make a great story really confused me.  I feel like each week I was there I tried a new way to connect with this specific kid – and sometimes it worked – other times it bombed.  I think it was a lack of reflection on my part to see why some things worked and why some did not.  Kids are complex little units and I am selling them very very short if it somehow gets lodged in my brain that there is only one way for them to learn.

Use of prior and emerging experience:  The first thing that came to my mind is T. at Apache and her ability to spin a story.  It was not at all true, but oh she believed it like it were the very skin on her body.  That is so inspiring to me.  I admit I struggled with letting her use those “pretend” experiences for her story – but it was her reality.  It was her prior experience to get caught up in her dreams and wishes and make them real.  The biggest thing that I learned is that we absolutely cannot lock “prior experience” into a box.  It is not as clear cut as we’d think that it is!  Thank you, T. for teaching me that.  I am forever grateful to you.

Reflectiveness:  I’ve noticed a really weird thing.  I thought it was a totally novel and great experience to have kids journal about everything.  Reflect and grow when they are learning…but they are just tired of it!  I’m not sure how or why it has crossed them.  I wonder if it may be that reflecting means a lot of times that we have to deal with hard things about life and ourselves and our society doesn’t value that.  I get caught up in resisting reflection for that very reason.  It’s hard to reflect.  It’s hard to come into direct contact with ourselves.  We need to teach our kids that it is ok for things not to be picture perfect.  That is where the growing happens.  That is where we find ourselves in spite of ourselves.

Estimated evaluation in terms of grade: I’m hoping for an A.  I just happen to be one of those little perfectionists.  You know me!

Suggestions for your own further development during the remainder of the semester:  Keep going!  I’m so stinking tired right now and if I can convince myself not to be scared out of my britches about next semester and to just keep going for the rest of this one, I’ll be great!

Suggestions for class activities or for the professor to better support learning:  Hmm…I’m not sure.  It would be nice if we discussed more about TESOL in class.